Questions from Readers

Here's a few recently asked questions from emails and comments:

"When are you going to continue your matchmaking series? I'm newly single, and realize that one of the big downfalls of my last relationship was our differences in the philosophy of money."

The Money Match series will still continue whenever someone wants me to post a profile! We've had seven entries, and I think I've only had two requests to make contact. I forwarded those on but never heard back as to whether anything happened. I thought it might not be working because the readers of this blog are so far flung across the US and other countries-- but you never know! I recently had an email from someone who discovered that one of his work colleagues also read the site.

"When are you going to post the story about your big expensive vacation?"

Groan-- I've had the post in draft for ages. I need to go back and itemize the various expenses and also collect some photos to put up. I don't know why I keep procrastinating about it-- at first I think part of the reason was that I was embarrassed to say I spent around $8,000 on a vacation in this economy, even for a once in a lifetime experience. But posting my annual expense wrap-up at least got the total travel number out there, so now I think it's just that I've been busy and have been finding it harder to write longer posts lately. I swear I'll try to finish it soon!

"How were you able to get such a high ranking in the Google search results for 'Personal Finance Blog?'"

I'm not sure, exactly, other than that I've been blogging for quite a while now, have built up a lot of incoming links, and the words "personal finance blog" are in the title, meta name descriptions, and meta name keywords in my blog template. I forget where I picked up that tip, and please don't ask me any more technical questions than that!

"Would you link to my blog?"

Yes, if you have a personal finance blog that really is personal, and not something that is just spammy advertising, I'd be happy to exchange links. But I use Blogrolling.com to maintain my links and their system hasn't been functioning for a few months. I don't really want to recreate my whole blogroll from scratch so until they fix the ability to edit links, I won't be doing any blogroll updates. But I've been saving requests and will hopefully be able to put up new links soon.

"Will you post this article that we have written? You can have it for free as long as you link back to our site!"

No, thank you. Aside from the occasional guest post from blog pals whose writing I enjoy and respect, I prefer to stick with what seems to work best on this blog: personal stories and explorations of financial issues as they relate to my own experience. I try to link to useful articles and resources when appropriate but I'll leave generic advice to others who are better equipped to offer it.

"Will you review this new personal finance book? I'm happy to send you a copy."

Alas, though I love free books, I don't give out my mailing address. But if you have a Word document that you can email to me, I'll read the manuscript electronically and post a review-- if I have the time, interest, etc. No promises, but hey, I'm saving you the postage anyway! (By the way, the publicist for The Secret Currency of Love was kind enough to share a manuscript this way, and I'm working on a review to be posted soon.)

Thanks for all your emails and comments everyone, I'm always happy to get them!

Money Match #7: Rob: Chicago Male Seeking Male

Here's another Money Match personal ad from a longtime reader. He sounds like a nice catch so step right up, Chicago-area gay guys!

I am a pretty clean cut guy on the outside (6', 195, brown hair/eyes, solid/stocky build). 34 years old, MBA. I work for a very large, stable bank as a project manager. Admittedly, I'm not saving the world, but I actually like what I do. Make a very comfortable living and trying (trying is the operative word) to be a better saver. Contribute 8% to 401K, save 10-20% of net income each month into a cash reserve (not too big yet). $60K in 401K. Have a condo in Chicago; all-in housing costs are 28% of net income, car 10% of net, pretty conservative on other expenses. No credit card debt, student loan with a tiny monthly payment, paid off HELOC. Doing all right overall. Weaknesses are clothes I just don't need but want, and I hate to cook so I eat out more than I should. Saving is important, but so is enjoying life.

Financially, I want someone who has similar financial values. He can make $50K or $150K, but he needs to have a level head and be reasonable (how's that for open-ended?) about money. I have too many friends in the 6 figure range living paycheck to paycheck.

I like to surround myself with people who put effort into bettering themselves. And by bettering oneself, I do not mean trading in the VW for a BMW. Although I like nice material things, a larger paycheck or more expensive car is not the secret to happiness.

I need a guy who is strong yet sensitive, opinionated yet respectful if I disagree, educated but not condescending, confident but not cocky. He also should be able to make fun of himself instead of somebody else.

I like to do most things as long I am with people I care about. Shopping, working out, theater, biking, dining out, bars...as long as I am with those important to me. People should always come first (I said this even before I heard it from Suze Orman, my other financial guru).

Wow...quite a few "I" statements, but dating is about marketing oneself, right?

That's Rob in a nutshell.

Aside from being highly flattered that Suze Orman is his "other" financial guru, I was impressed by Rob's commitment to savings-- 10-20% of his net income each month, and he's trying to be better! And if you read the archives of this blog very carefully, you'll also learn that he wears nice undies. Just send me an email if Rob sounds like the man for you!

You too can search for your financial soulmate from among the readers of this site: here's the original post explaining the whole concept, but it's simple: if you'd like to meet someone who shares your financial philosophies, write up a profile, including a photo if you want, and email it to openwallet1 [at symbol] yahoo [dot] com. I'll post them and forward any responses. Thanks for playing!

Money Match #6: Anya, Boston area Female Seeking Male

Here's another Money Match profile, from someone whose experience living in China has given her a very interesting perspective on personal finance:

My vital stats--I'm 34 years old, female, single, and living in the Boston area.

Frugality gives me a cheap thrill (heh). But I am definitely frugal as opposed to cheap. I was raised to pay for quality, rather than buying something cheaper that wouldn't last. I was also raised to pay off credit card bills immediately, the very moment they arrived. Both of those are ingrained in me and I live by them. I have no debt and don't own many clothes or other objects, but the ones I own I value highly and use often. I have no car, no mortgage (although I may someday), and no kids (which may also change at some point). I pay about $725 in rent and utilities every month, and make about 56K/year working in the educational publishing industry.

I lived in semi-rural China from 1997 to 1999, teaching English with the Peace Corps. In China, "How much money do you make?" is a popular conversation-starter when you meet a new person, very much like "So what do you do?" in the States. As volunteers, we were given a living allowance of about $125/month, which was about twice what the Chinese teachers at our school made, and about half of what the local taxi drivers made! Still, all the Chinese people we met assumed we were all wealthy since we were Americans. One nice benefit I got out of my time in China is that I am no longer afraid of bargaining, or of discussing salary openly. There's such a stigma against that in the U.S., and I think that makes it a lot harder for people to demand raises and really push for the benefits they deserve at their jobs here.

I guess the main thing I learned about money in China is that over there, a person's value and their salary are separate. No one would ever make a correlation between how much money I earned and what kind of person I was. Here in the U.S., net worth and personal worth are closely intertwined. Money is weird, because it's both the most objective and impersonal thing ever--and also, at the same time, wicked personal. I think I have a healthy relationship to it, in general, and I try not to give it either too much or too little importance as I plan (and live) my life.

I just love the interesting financial stories that some of these profiles come with-- I'm sure those Peace Corps years helped make Anya's current frugal lifestyle seem quite luxurious.

Anya is looking to meet a like-minded gentleman in the Boston area, so if you're interested, email me (at openwallet1 [at] yahoo [dot] com) and I'll forward your response to her.

Money Match #5: Erin, Nashville Female Seeking Friends

It's been a while since we had any Money Match posts-- mainly because I totally flaked out and let a couple entries languish in the depths of my inbox. Sorry! This week a new entry reminded me I'd better catch up!

This latest entry is from a young country music fan who describes herself as "not the most financially stable but trying to get there:"

I'm 23 year old female living in Music City, USA (aka Nashville, TN) with my dream job on the outskirts of Country music. I've been working full time since my Junior year of college but insisted on going to a private university because it was the best in the country for my major. This of course is my only form of debt, 54k in student loans. I have no credit card debt, no car payment, etc. I've lucked out and been given a MacBook by my employer and keep my bills low by taking advantage of my apartment's close proximity to my office to avoid paying for internet.

The unfortunate part of my dream job is that it's in an industry famous for paying it's employees in concert tickets and CDs. I work two jobs, and from time to time add a third, giving myself a seven day work week. My financial goal for the year is to contribute 3k to my IRA, which currently sits around 2k and then save a six month contingency. I haven't gotten far, but I think I'm on the right track for a nice financial future.

As for this personal? I'm not sure if I'm interested in dating, but rather meeting individuals around my age, just as aware of their spending/saving habits. At times I can be rather impressionable and get carried away by friends that charge their Visa card to the max. I'd like to meet people that have a good time sitting on the front porch sippin' some homemade wine, walking around a local free festival, hiking in a state park or any other activity that doesn't involve cash or excessive fuel costs.

Sounds like she might know how to make homemade wine, which would certainly have me showing up on her front porch if I lived in Nashville! Email me at openwallet1 [at] yahoo [dot] com if you'd like to get in touch with Erin!

You can see other Money Match posts here. Just email me if you would like to submit your own personal ad in the hopes of meeting other My Open Wallet readers. (And I promise I'll try to stay more on schedule with posting these!) So far there's been one connection made but I never heard back as to whether they actually met up and liked each other!

Money Match #4: "Venice," St.Louis female seeking male

Here's the next entry in the Money Match personal ad series, a woman who is calling herself Venice-- I'm guessing that must be one of the places she lived in or at least visited while living abroad! Sounds like she has a great career but now wants to focus on enjoying life, and enjoying the company of someone who's ready to do the same.

This is such a great idea. I have become very involved with personal finance in the last year or so and though 30 and single it does cross my mind every so often about how hard it would be if I became involved with someone who did not have a similar financial mindset.

I am a 30 year old female attorney living in St. Louis, Missouri. I've lived in the east coast and a few other countries but currently enjoy the calm of life in the midwest. I have built up a nice emergency fund and invest regularly. I am decently frugal as in I don't deprive myself of events that make me happy like hanging out with friends or travel or eating at good restaurants every once in a while. I do focus on my shopping habits to make sure I don't overspend in those areas and am glad to say I've been doing really great. I try to tell all my friends how focusing on where your money goes really does help you move from living paycheck to paycheck. Goals-- probably invest much more in the stock market, get into real estate, earn enough to definitely slow down the work pace when I have kids and retire early (mid 50's)

I would love to meet a like-minded gentleman within 5 -7 years age range.

thanks

Venice

PS- I am regularly described as beautiful so that's not a problem. No hangups, just been focusing on career too hard and now its time to switch gears.

If Venice sounds like someone you'd like to meet, shoot me an email and I'll forward it to her!

Other Money Match personals:
IM, Chicago Female Seeking Male
SuperCop, DC/MD/VA/PA - Area Male Seeking Female
Tom, NYC Male Seeking Female

You too can search for your financial soulmate from among the readers of this site: here's the original post explaining the whole concept, but it's simple: if you'd like to meet someone who shares your financial philosophies, write up a profile, including a photo if you want, and email it to openwallet1 [at symbol] yahoo [dot] com. I'll post them and forward any responses. Thanks for playing!

Money Match #3: Tom, NYC Male Seeking Female

Here's the next entry in the Money Match personal ad series, Tom, a young New Yorker who has his eyes on the retirement prize but still keeps a sense of balance about enjoying life in the here and now:

I'm a mid 20s man living in NYC and have been reading your blog for about a year. Financially my philosophy is to save enough for a comfortable (perhaps early) retirement while still having fun. I am able to max out my retirement accounts and still go out with buddies on weekends as well as traveling on vacations (Puerto Rico then Europe are next on the list). I keep a budget every month and stick to it. Right now the only debts I have are student loans which were well worth it considering they helped me to get my dream career. I would describe my job as recession-proof with compensation in line with the degree of difficulty.

I'm looking for someone with similar financial goals. Someone who has retirement in her budget but is willing to spend and have fun while getting there.

If Tom sounds like the man for you, you can email me and I'll forward your response to him. Our first two Money Match participants weren't New Yorkers, but this time I'm hoping we can get some local action going! And don't worry, I won't ask to be a chaperone on your first date.

Other Money Match personals:
IM, Chicago Female Seeking Male
SuperCop, DC/MD/VA/PA - Area Male Seeking Female

You too can search for your financial soulmate from among the readers of this site: here's the original post explaining the whole concept, but it's simple: if you'd like to meet someone who shares your financial philosophies, write up a profile, including a photo if you want, and email it to openwallet1 [at symbol] yahoo [dot] com. I'll post them and forward any responses. Thanks for playing!

Money Match #2: "IM," Chicago female seeking male

Madame X the Matchmaker now introduces our first female single, a frugal lady known as IM:


Here's her message:

Frugal Fundamentals
Im a frugal girl at heart who loves nice stuff but loves her bank balance a little more. Im 28 and already own two properties, one investment and one condo. All of that was only possible by saving and not falling prey to crazy consumerism.

The thing that makes me happiest? - Finding an awesome piece of art at a local yard sale. I live in Chicago and am interested in finding someone who takes pride in being understated...yes...thats right...Im not impressed by flashy cars and $3k purses. He should love reading, be a dog lover and know how to balance his checkbook. (Besides being independent and cool...)

ps: NO I dont smoke...this was staged :)

Wow, a 28-year old who saved enough to buy two properties AND has a really hot photo? Chicago area gentlemen, this could be your lucky day! If you'd like to woo IM, email your frugal flirting response to openwallet1 [at symbol] yahoo [dot] com and I'll forward it to her. Who knows, perhaps you could be her solvent soulmate!

You too can send in a personal ad! Details in this post.

A Not-NYC Story: The Financial Life of a Police Officer (and first Money Match candidate!)

I loved running the New York Stories series because it was a chance to learn more about the lives of some of my readers. But not all my readers live in New York, and it's wonderful to hear from those who live in other areas. Here's an email I got from someone recently, the person who inspired me to start the Money Match series of personal ads (you'll see why towards the end). In fact, I have to make this the honorary #1 entry in the Money Match series, as I think many of my female readers will be as charmed as I was by his story and would love to know more about him even though I can't publicly say where he lives! (Ok, he has admitted it's "DC/VA/MD/PA area.") I'm going to call him SuperCop to protect his privacy (and because I like the idea of him rappeling through an apartment window!) Here's his email:

I've been reading your blog for the past few months. Before I found it, I thought I was the only weirdo that loved knowing what other people make, how they save/spend/invest their money, and how to best control my own finances. The reason why I'm writing you, besides to tell you to keep up the great work, is that I was wondering if you could do a piece on NYPD officers (specifically those that live in the boroughs..New Jersey doesnt count :P ), their finances, and how they manage to survive living in the city. I don't know how it works for them up there, as far as working overtime and working secondary employment, but you can make and save a considerable amount of money as a police officer. When I started with the State Police in 2004, my starting salary was $37,000 per year. As of July 1st of this year, with the measly 2% increase we got it will be $54,000. Where it gets really good is when you add in a take-home vehicle.

I drive an unmarked 2007 Ford Crown Victoria that I can use off-duty and I fill up at the state gas pumps. The only drawback is that I can't drive it out of state unless it's business related. Regardless, I haven't owned a car or been to a gas station in 3 years, I cancelled my internet as I have an in-car computer with access (though it's dial-up), and I got rid of my nextel phone (saves me $100 per month), use my business Blackberry, and make sure to constantly remind friends and family to call me only after 7pm so I don't use up my Anytime minutes.

The next thing is my work schedule. I work 10 hour shifts and it usually works out to where I only work 15 days out of the month. For those 15 days off I work as many part-time shifts as I can. One job has me directing traffic out of a church for $45 per church mass and each mass takes about 15 minutes to clear out the traffic. The church job brings $4704 a year after taxes. The next job is security at a train station. It's 8 hour shifts @ $40 per hour, and I work around 10 shifts a month at the station so that's an extra $38,400 (pre-tax) per year. Miscellaneous jobs (ones where I fill in for someone or it's short-term) adds another $4,000 or so. Our pay rate for different jobs is based on what's expected of us:

$25 per hour - We will provide police presence, mostly sitting in our car, and in my case... going thru myopenwallet archives. I'm on February of this year right now. :) If anyone acts up I'll generally give them the hairy eyeball and if they don't get the hint, gently encourage them to take it elsewhere.

$35-40 per hour - Police presence, foot patrols, proactive enforcement

$50 per hour - I will chase errant crackheads across rooftops, rappel through apartment windows, and climb up after kittens in trees.

The main drawback of working secondary employment is if you get hurt, it's not covered as line of duty, which means if I get hurt badly enough... I'm out of a job and alot of money. That's why businesses get exactly what they pay for. You are not going to get SuperCop service for $25 per hour. Supercop has a much greater chance of getting hurt. The big benefit for them hiring us is people know the difference between rent-a-cops and an off-duty police officer. They know they can pretty much get away with murder with a rent-a-cop but the moment they cross the line, commit a misdemeanor or felony, I immediately go into on-duty status and before you know it they are cuffed and in the back of a paddy wagon.

As far as personal finances go... I'm cheap. Not quite to cheap bastard level yet but I'm getting there. I haven't bought Quicken yet (don't want to spend the money) but I have nice little pocket notebooks that I track expenses in and I obsessively check my banking and brokerage accounts. My net worth isn't that high, only $60,000 or so, as I didn't become a born-again cheapass until a few years ago and had the epiphany, "Wow! Money really IS important, and life ends up sucking if you piss it away." I'm an only child and a Leo. Yeah, not good.

My main goal right now is to save for a massive downpayment on a home, and possibly invest in the next year or two in a piece of land to build it on. I found a 10-acre parcel in a rural area only 15 minutes away and I'm really considering it as it's only $250,000, which is a steal! When I do select my site this is EXACTLY what I want to build:


http://www.oskaarchitects.com/Projects/38/Delta-Shelter

Granted, I know the costs (materials-wise) will be huge but I figure if I save and scrimp for the next 8 years I'll have $240,000 saved that will help considerably. I don't think it will cramp my living that much as my expenses are pretty low IMO:

Rent:

$550 per month (Share single-family home with 1 roommate in nice quiet neighborhood. My online snooping shows it's worth around $270,000)

Utilities:

$33.00 water
$60.00 electric

Daycare:

$400.00 per month + $100 for baby food and incidentals. She's only
a little one and doesn't take up a large part of my food budget... yet.

Again, no car payment, no car insurance, no cell phone bill, and no internet.

Food: I need to start tracking this more but seeing how I rarely eat out (try to eat at work most of the time) and I'm not going out partying and drinking all the time I figure it's not much of an issue. Whenever I go to work about 90% of the time I pack a lunch, mostly PB&J and fruit. I DO splurge on the good stuff as far as PB goes... I get all-natural Maranatha.

That's pretty much it. Seeing how I work so much I don't have much as far as entertainment expenses go. I haven't bothered dating (me and my daughter's mother, baby's mama, what have you, are no longer together) as all I could think of is all the money I'd be spending, all the money I could be making, and how I need to focus on my financial goals. Besides, whatever time I do have off is spent with my daughter and she only has her childhood once and I plan to make the most of it. I wish that they had a dating site for frugal/cheap people. Post a profile of how frugal you are, pictures of your hybrid, and thifty singles should be flocking to you! Sure, physical beauty is nice, but there are two things that I find attractive in a woman above all else: 1) Good with her money, frugal, likes to itemize dinner bills, have a pizza and wine budgeting party, etc. 2) She's a klutz. I think I'm the only one in the world with #2 as a fetish. I once saw this cute woman with these little hipster glasses on at a Bloomingdales that was setting up a children's clothes display. She somehow loses her balance, knocks over racks of clothing, and falls right on her ass. At that moment I was in love.

Anyway, I have absolutely no idea if any of this interests you seeing how I'm not from NYC but I wanted you to know that even though my body is elsewhere I have a NYC soul :) Even if I did have the money to live there I don't think I would. I think I enjoy just admiring it from afar and most importantly, my daughter is here and I want to be living no more than 15 minutes away from her. Thank you again for your wonderful blog, KEEP writing, and if I can make one suggestion... post more real estate porn! Nothing would excite me more than getting my $2.49 latte (Dunkin Donuts is MUCH cheaper than Starbucks and NO I don't get any donuts :) ), booting up my in-car computer, and taking that first sip while seeing photos of some high-end Manhattan real-state and the juicy gossip that goes along with it.

I hope SuperCop will keep in touch so we'll know where he's at in a few years: I bet he'll have built his beautiful house, and I just hope his klutzy soulmate doesn't fall down those outdoor stairs!

I Need Singles!

And I don't mean one dollar bills! I mean single people who are looking for love-- financially compatible love!

Inspired by an email from a reader (whose very interesting story will soon be told in a post on this site), I thought it would be fun to introduce a new regular feature, the My Open Wallet Money Matchmaker Single of the Month, or something along those lines with a catchier title yet to be determined! (Solvent Soulmates? Financial Fix-up? Dating for Dollars?)

A couple thousand people regularly visit this site, and though you are spread far and wide across the country and even the world, you all share an interest in personal finance. I'm sure many of you would have other things in common too, so why not offer the opportunity to do a little frugal flirting!

Here's how it will work: if you are looking for love (or new friends or whatever) send me an email (to openwallet1 [ insert "at" sign] yahoo [dot] com) describing yourself and the kind of person you'd like to meet. I'll keep this free-form: no need to answer any particular questions, but given the nature of this site, I think it would be great if people talked about their financial philosophies and goals. If you want, feel free to also send a photo.
Once I post the profile, people can either respond to me by email, or in the comments. And if some lucky connections are made, I hope the participants will agree to tell a story about how things go! Of course everyone will want to know how the check was paid on the first date!

Of course I have to add a disclaimer that a) I can't guarantee that I'll be able to post every profile submitted, and b) I can't be held responsible for the accuracy of any submitted profiles or the outcome of any contacts made via this site but I will do my best to make sure this is safe and fun for everyone!

Also, if you like the idea of connecting with other My Open Wallet readers but don't want to play the whole dating game, don't forget there is a Facebook fan group you can join!